Bad jokes

Make no mistake about it, there are really bad jokes in this world. Many of the “Ouch !!!” variety.

These are jokes that you can’t laugh about, you leave the room rolling your eyes or just want to disappear into the ground in shame.

And then there are jokes that are bad, but at the same time you can laugh at them, simply because they are so mercilessly bad and somehow have a punch line that you never expected. Really not!

These jokes have their justification and therefore these bad jokes should not be missing here!

Humor is always subjective, that is clear, and diverse, so there are also many lovers of terrible one-liners and lousy punchlines.

Like an example? Gladly!

What do you call a fly without wings? A walk!

Bad right? Or is there a smile on your face after all!

We have put together over 300 bad jokes for you and wish you a lot of fun while creeping and laughing.

Why can’t… - Bad jokes - Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because the P is silent.

Why can’t…

Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because the P is silent.
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What did the… - Bad jokes - What did the princess say in the photo booth? “Someday my prints will come.”

What did the…

What did the princess say in the photo booth? “Someday my prints will come.”
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There's no hole… - Bad jokes - There's no hole in your shoe? Then how'd you get your foot in it?

There’s no hole…

There’s no hole in your shoe? Then how’d you get your foot in it?
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Hey you! Funny pickup lines? you can find here. Use at your own risk!
What do you… - Bad jokes - What do you call a fly without wings? A walk!

What do you…

What do you call a fly without wings? A walk!
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What do you… - Bad jokes - What do you call Samsung’s security team? The Guardians of the Galaxy!

What do you…

What do you call Samsung’s security team? The Guardians of the Galaxy!
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What do you… - Bad jokes - What do you call someone else’s cheese? Nacho cheese!

What do you…

What do you call someone else’s cheese? Nacho cheese!
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Do you know all Knock Knock jokes? Try it out!
What's the best… - Bad jokes - What's the best thing about Switzerland? I don't know, but its flag is a big plus!

What’s the best…

What’s the best thing about Switzerland? I don’t know, but its flag is a big plus!
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I went on… - Bad jokes - I went on a once-in-a-lifetime vacation. Never again.

I went on…

I went on a once-in-a-lifetime vacation. Never again.
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What do you… - Bad jokes - What do you call a pony with a sore throat? A little hoarse.

What do you…

What do you call a pony with a sore throat? A little hoarse.
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Check out our Chuck Norris jokes? Quickly! Before Chuck Norris finds out!
What did the… - Bad jokes - What did the blanket say as it fell off the bed? "Oh sheet!"

What did the…

What did the blanket say as it fell off the bed? “Oh sheet!”
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Why are there… - Bad jokes - Why are there fences are cemeteries? Because everyone’s always dying to get in.

Why are there…

Why are there fences are cemeteries? Because everyone’s always dying to get in.
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What do you… - Bad jokes - What do you call a dangerous sun shower? A rain of terror!

What do you…

What do you call a dangerous sun shower? A rain of terror!
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Blonde jokes, who doesn't know them, but have you heard these?
What did the… - Bad jokes - What did the drummer call his two twin daughters? Anna one, Anna two.

What did the…

What did the drummer call his two twin daughters? Anna one, Anna two.
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When's the best… - Bad jokes - When's the best time to go to the dentist? Tooth-hurtie!

When’s the best…

When’s the best time to go to the dentist? Tooth-hurtie!
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What should a… - Bad jokes - What should a sick bird do? Get tweetment.

What should a…

What should a sick bird do? Get tweetment.
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Funny sayings? for any occasion, here you will find them.
When is a… - Bad jokes - When is a door not really a door? When it’s really ajar.

When is a…

When is a door not really a door? When it’s really ajar.
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What do you… - Bad jokes - What do you call a factory that sells generally decent goods? A satisfactory.

What do you…

What do you call a factory that sells generally decent goods? A satisfactory.
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Did you hear… - Bad jokes - Did you hear about the two thieves who stole a calendar? They each got six months.

Did you hear…

Did you hear about the two thieves who stole a calendar? They each got six months.
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funny dad jokes, at your own risk!
Does anyone need… - Bad jokes - Does anyone need an ark? I Noah guy.

Does anyone need…

Does anyone need an ark? I Noah guy.
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Where do mansplainers… - Bad jokes - Where do mansplainers get their water? From a well, actually.

Where do mansplainers…

Where do mansplainers get their water? From a well, actually.
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What did the… - Bad jokes - What did the over-excited gardener do when spring came? She wet her plants.

What did the…

What did the over-excited gardener do when spring came? She wet her plants.
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You like it short and sweet? Perfect! Here come our Jokes One Liners!
I'm terrified of… - Bad jokes - I'm terrified of elevators so I'm going to start taking steps to avoid them.

I’m terrified of…

I’m terrified of elevators so I’m going to start taking steps to avoid them.
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What do clouds… - Bad jokes - What do clouds wear under their shorts? Thunderpants.

What do clouds…

What do clouds wear under their shorts? Thunderpants.
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What kind of… - Bad jokes - What kind of dogs love car racing? Lap dogs!

What kind of…

What kind of dogs love car racing? Lap dogs!
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Anyone who likes dark humor jokes has a high IQ and is damn good looking too!
What's the difference… - Bad jokes - What's the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with breast implants? One is a crusty bus station and the other is a busty crustacean.

What’s the difference…

What’s the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with breast implants? One is a crusty bus station and the other is a busty crustacean.
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I used to… - Bad jokes - I used to hate body hair, but then it grew on me.

I used to…

I used to hate body hair, but then it grew on me.
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What’s the… - Bad jokes - What’s the difference between a dapper man on a bicycle and a poorly dressed man on a unicycle? Attire!

What’s the…

What’s the difference between a dapper man on a bicycle and a poorly dressed man on a unicycle? Attire!
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No more good punchlines! Here come our anti jokes!
What’s the… - Bad jokes - What’s the action like at a circus? In-tents.

What’s the…

What’s the action like at a circus? In-tents.
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I put my… - Bad jokes - I put my root beer into a square glass. Now it's just beer.

I put my…

I put my root beer into a square glass. Now it’s just beer.
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What's the most… - Bad jokes - What's the most terrifying word in nuclear physics? "Oops!"

What’s the most…

What’s the most terrifying word in nuclear physics? “Oops!”
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What did the… - Bad jokes - What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? “Aye, matey!”

What did the…

What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? “Aye, matey!”
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What do you… - Bad jokes - What do you call someone who points out the obvious? Someone who points out the obvious.

What do you…

What do you call someone who points out the obvious? Someone who points out the obvious.
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What do you… - Bad jokes - What do you call a fish with two knees? A tunee fish.

What do you…

What do you call a fish with two knees? A tunee fish.
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Why can't you… - Bad jokes - Why can't you trust an atom? Because they make up everything.

Why can’t you…

Why can’t you trust an atom? Because they make up everything.
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A man died… - Bad jokes - A man died after drinking varnish. It was a terrible end, but a beautiful finish.

A man died…

A man died after drinking varnish. It was a terrible end, but a beautiful finish.
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How can you… - Bad jokes - How can you find Will Smith in the snow? Follow the fresh prints.

How can you…

How can you find Will Smith in the snow? Follow the fresh prints.
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I want to… - Bad jokes - I want to go camping every year. That trip was so in tents.

I want to…

I want to go camping every year. That trip was so in tents.
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What kind of… - Bad jokes - What kind of music do windmills like? They’re metal fans.

What kind of…

What kind of music do windmills like? They’re metal fans.
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What do you… - Bad jokes - What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick!

What do you…

What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick!
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What did the… - Bad jokes - What did the green grape say to the purple grape? "Breathe, damn it! Breathe!"

What did the…

What did the green grape say to the purple grape? “Breathe, damn it! Breathe!”
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Why do birds… - Bad jokes - Why do birds fly south for the winter? Because it’s too far to walk.

Why do birds…

Why do birds fly south for the winter? Because it’s too far to walk.
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Why do you… - Bad jokes - Why do you smear peanut butter on the road? To go with the traffic jam.

Why do you…

Why do you smear peanut butter on the road? To go with the traffic jam.
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What do you… - Bad jokes - What do you do when you see a spaceman? Park in it, man.

What do you…

What do you do when you see a spaceman? Park in it, man.
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Why shouldn’t… - Bad jokes - Why shouldn’t you write with a dull pencil? Because it’s pointless.

Why shouldn’t…

Why shouldn’t you write with a dull pencil? Because it’s pointless.
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What was the… - Bad jokes - What was the mummy’s favorite type of music? Wrap.

What was the…

What was the mummy’s favorite type of music? Wrap.
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What do you… - Bad jokes - What do you give to a sick lemon? Lemon aid!

What do you…

What do you give to a sick lemon? Lemon aid!
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Why did the… - Bad jokes - Why did the baby cookie cry? Because its mother was a wafer so long.

Why did the…

Why did the baby cookie cry? Because its mother was a wafer so long.
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Why couldn't the… - Bad jokes - Why couldn't the bicycle stand up? Because it was too tired.

Why couldn’t the…

Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up? Because it was too tired.
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How do you… - Bad jokes - How do you find Will Smith in the snow? Just follow the fresh prints!

How do you…

How do you find Will Smith in the snow? Just follow the fresh prints!
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The guy that… - Bad jokes - The guy that invented the umbrella was gonna call it the brella. But he hesitated.

The guy that…

The guy that invented the umbrella was gonna call it the brella. But he hesitated.
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