What do you… - Christmas jokes - What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite!

What do you…

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite!
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What does Donald… - Christmas jokes - What does Donald Trump do after he pulls a cracker? Pays her off!

What does Donald…

What does Donald Trump do after he pulls a cracker? Pays her off!
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A book never… - Christmas jokes - A book never written: How to Decorate a Tree, by Orna Ment.

A book never…

A book never written: How to Decorate a Tree, by Orna Ment.
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Hey you! Funny pickup lines? you can find here. Use at your own risk!
Knock, knock! Who… - Christmas jokes - Knock, knock! Who’s there? Snow. Snow who? Snow time to waste. It’s almost Christmas!

Knock, knock! Who…

Knock, knock! Who’s there? Snow. Snow who? Snow time to waste. It’s almost Christmas!
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Why wouldn’t… - Christmas jokes - Why wouldn’t the cat climb the Christmas tree? It was afraid of the bark.

Why wouldn’t…

Why wouldn’t the cat climb the Christmas tree? It was afraid of the bark.
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How does Darth… - Christmas jokes - How does Darth Vader enjoy his Christmas Turkey? On the dark side!

How does Darth…

How does Darth Vader enjoy his Christmas Turkey? On the dark side!
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Do you know all Knock Knock jokes? Try it out!
What do you… - Christmas jokes - What do you call buying a piano for the holidays? Christmas Chopin!

What do you…

What do you call buying a piano for the holidays? Christmas Chopin!
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What does Santa… - Christmas jokes - What does Santa do when his elves misbehave? He gives them the sack.

What does Santa…

What does Santa do when his elves misbehave? He gives them the sack.
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Knock, knock! Who… - Christmas jokes - Knock, knock! Who’s there? Interrupting Santa. Inter– Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas!

Knock, knock! Who…

Knock, knock! Who’s there? Interrupting Santa. Inter– Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas!
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Check out our Chuck Norris jokes? Quickly! Before Chuck Norris finds out!
Why does Scrooge… - Christmas jokes - Why does Scrooge love reindeer so much? Because every single buck is dear to him!

Why does Scrooge…

Why does Scrooge love reindeer so much? Because every single buck is dear to him!
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Why was Santa… - Christmas jokes - Why was Santa’s little helper depressed? Because he had very low elf esteem.

Why was Santa…

Why was Santa’s little helper depressed? Because he had very low elf esteem.
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What’s the… - Christmas jokes - What’s the most popular Christmas wine? ‘But I don’t like Brussels sprouts!’

What’s the…

What’s the most popular Christmas wine? ‘But I don’t like Brussels sprouts!’
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Blonde jokes, who doesn't know them, but have you heard these?
What do monkeys… - Christmas jokes - What do monkeys sing at Christmas? Jungle bells!

What do monkeys…

What do monkeys sing at Christmas? Jungle bells!
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What do you… - Christmas jokes - What do you call an obnoxious reindeer? Rude-olph.

What do you…

What do you call an obnoxious reindeer? Rude-olph.
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Did you hear… - Christmas jokes - Did you hear about the dyslexic Satanist? He sold his soul to Santa.

Did you hear…

Did you hear about the dyslexic Satanist? He sold his soul to Santa.
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Funny sayings? for any occasion, here you will find them.
What do Santa's… - Christmas jokes - What do Santa's elves learn in school? The elf-abet.

What do Santa’s…

What do Santa’s elves learn in school? The elf-abet.
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What do you… - Christmas jokes - What do you get if you cross Santa with a duck? A Christmas Quacker!

What do you…

What do you get if you cross Santa with a duck? A Christmas Quacker!
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What did Frosty… - Christmas jokes - What did Frosty’s girlfriend give him when she was mad at him? The cold shoulder.

What did Frosty…

What did Frosty’s girlfriend give him when she was mad at him? The cold shoulder.
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funny dad jokes, at your own risk!
What do you… - Christmas jokes - What do you call people who are afraid of Santa? Claustrophobic.

What do you…

What do you call people who are afraid of Santa? Claustrophobic.
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Why did the… - Christmas jokes - Why did the Grinch go to the liquor store? He was searching for some holiday spirit.

Why did the…

Why did the Grinch go to the liquor store? He was searching for some holiday spirit.
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Why didn’t… - Christmas jokes - Why didn’t Rudolph get a good report card? Because he went down in history.

Why didn’t…

Why didn’t Rudolph get a good report card? Because he went down in history.
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You like it short and sweet? Perfect! Here come our Jokes One Liners!
What’s the… - Christmas jokes - What’s the Grinch’s least favorite band? The Who!

What’s the…

What’s the Grinch’s least favorite band? The Who!
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What is a… - Christmas jokes - What is a Christmas tree’s favorite candy? Ornamints.

What is a…

What is a Christmas tree’s favorite candy? Ornamints.
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What goes “Oh… - Christmas jokes - What goes “Oh, Oh, Oh”? Santa walking backwards!

What goes “Oh…

What goes “Oh, Oh, Oh”? Santa walking backwards!
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Anyone who likes dark humor jokes has a high IQ and is damn good looking too!
Where do Santa's… - Christmas jokes - Where do Santa's reindeer stop for coffee? Star-bucks!

Where do Santa’s…

Where do Santa’s reindeer stop for coffee? Star-bucks!
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What do you… - Christmas jokes - What do you call a blind reindeer with no legs? Still no-eye deer.

What do you…

What do you call a blind reindeer with no legs? Still no-eye deer.
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Knock, knock! Who's… - Christmas jokes - Knock, knock! Who's there? Coal. Coal who? Coal me if you hear Santa coming.

Knock, knock! Who’s…

Knock, knock! Who’s there? Coal. Coal who? Coal me if you hear Santa coming.
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No more good punchlines! Here come our anti jokes!
What nationality is… - Christmas jokes - What nationality is Santa Claus? North Polish.

What nationality is…

What nationality is Santa Claus? North Polish.
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How much did… - Christmas jokes - How much did Santa pay for his sleigh? Nothing. It was on the house!

How much did…

How much did Santa pay for his sleigh? Nothing. It was on the house!
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Why is Santa… - Christmas jokes - Why is Santa so damn jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.

Why is Santa…

Why is Santa so damn jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.
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What do the… - Christmas jokes - What do the elves cook with in the kitchen? Utinsels!

What do the…

What do the elves cook with in the kitchen? Utinsels!
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Why did Donald… - Christmas jokes - Why did Donald Trump continuously decorate the Christmas tree? Because people kept saying “moron” to him!

Why did Donald…

Why did Donald Trump continuously decorate the Christmas tree? Because people kept saying “moron” to him!
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Why does Santa… - Christmas jokes - Why does Santa always come through the chimney? Because he knows better than to try the back door.

Why does Santa…

Why does Santa always come through the chimney? Because he knows better than to try the back door.
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What did the… - Christmas jokes - What did the beaver say to the Christmas Tree? Nice gnawing you!

What did the…

What did the beaver say to the Christmas Tree? Nice gnawing you!
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What do snowmen… - Christmas jokes - What do snowmen have for breakfast? Snowflakes!

What do snowmen…

What do snowmen have for breakfast? Snowflakes!
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Why did the… - Christmas jokes - Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber? It needed to be trimmed!

Why did the…

Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber? It needed to be trimmed!
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What is the… - Christmas jokes - What is the most competitive season? Win-ter!

What is the…

What is the most competitive season? Win-ter!
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What carol is… - Christmas jokes - What carol is heard in the desert? ‘O camel ye faithful!’

What carol is…

What carol is heard in the desert? ‘O camel ye faithful!’
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Why does Santa… - Christmas jokes - Why does Santa have elves in his workshop? Because the Seven Dwarfs were busy!

Why does Santa…

Why does Santa have elves in his workshop? Because the Seven Dwarfs were busy!
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Why couldn’t… - Christmas jokes - Why couldn’t the skeleton go to the Christmas Party? Because he had no body to go with!

Why couldn’t…

Why couldn’t the skeleton go to the Christmas Party? Because he had no body to go with!
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What athlete is… - Christmas jokes - What athlete is warmest in winter? A long jumper!

What athlete is…

What athlete is warmest in winter? A long jumper!
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Christmas: The time… - Christmas jokes - Christmas: The time when everyone gets Santamental.

Christmas: The time…

Christmas: The time when everyone gets Santamental.
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How did the… - Christmas jokes - How did the bauble know that she was addicted to Christmas? She’d been hooked on Christmas trees all her life.

How did the…

How did the bauble know that she was addicted to Christmas? She’d been hooked on Christmas trees all her life.
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Why does Santa… - Christmas jokes - Why does Santa go down the chimney? Because it soots him!

Why does Santa…

Why does Santa go down the chimney? Because it soots him!
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Did you hear… - Christmas jokes - Did you hear about the man who stole an advent calendar? He got 25 days.

Did you hear…

Did you hear about the man who stole an advent calendar? He got 25 days.
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What is the… - Christmas jokes - What is the best evidence that Microsoft has a monopoly? Santa Claus had to switch from Chimneys to Windows.

What is the…

What is the best evidence that Microsoft has a monopoly? Santa Claus had to switch from Chimneys to Windows.
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What kind of… - Christmas jokes - What kind of motorbike does Santa ride? A Holly Davidson!

What kind of…

What kind of motorbike does Santa ride? A Holly Davidson!
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Why did Santa… - Christmas jokes - Why did Santa have to go to the hospital? Because of his poor elf.

Why did Santa…

Why did Santa have to go to the hospital? Because of his poor elf.
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What do you… - Christmas jokes - What do you get when you cross a deer with rain? A reindeer!

What do you…

What do you get when you cross a deer with rain? A reindeer!
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How does Rudolph… - Christmas jokes - How does Rudolph know when Christmas is coming? He refers to his calen-deer.

How does Rudolph…

How does Rudolph know when Christmas is coming? He refers to his calen-deer.
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