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Dad jokes

Are dad jokes funny? This my dear friends, is a really hard question to answer. First of all, let’s establish the basic fact: fathers are great. They create a space full of affection, freedom and boundaries for the optimal development of their own offspring. They supported learning to ride a bike, are great play partners and are a great support and orientation.

At the same time, and I’m sorry to have to write it this way, being a dad myself, dads tell horrible jokes. Dads are nut funny. Never, ever, ever, not even close. I have a great son and well, I love jokes and telling them, I do so with passion, but my son cannot laugh at them in most cases. Dear dads, do you recognize yourselves?

Funny dad jokes aren‘t funny, are they?

It is a phenomenon, where do fathers get their bad jokes? It seems to be a special talent, a questionable gift, to remember exactly these, to tell them over and over again without being asked, and to laugh themselves to pieces and collect a pitiful smile from the youth.

You want an example? You’re welcome to it:

“Hi dad, I’m hungry!”
“Hi hungry, I’m dad!”

This joke is probably one of the most famous funny dad jokes. It’s not funny, in fact it’s pretty bad, but at the same time it has a surprising punch line and when you look at it more closely it’s quite funny.

Young people would probably never admit this officially, but I personally believe that they do enjoy it when we tell jokes like this, and laugh ourselves silly. It’s an unwritten law of nature, fathers tell bad jokes. I wouldn’t be surprised if the Neanderthal dad had already grunted unfunny jokes to his children. Perhaps one should also consult the Bible here, I am unfortunately not Bible-fast, can anyone help here?

And our sons will also become fathers someday and will proudly follow in our footsteps to regale the youth with equally bad jokes. Eye-rolling is certain, and that’s a good thing.

Do you know… - Dad jokes - Do you know the last thing my grandfather said to me before he kicked the bucket?

Do you know…

Do you know the last thing my grandfather said to me before he kicked the bucket?
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Grandson, watch how… - Dad jokes - Grandson, watch how far I can kick this bucket.

Grandson, watch how…

Grandson, watch how far I can kick this bucket.
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You’re American… - Dad jokes - You’re American when you go into a bathroom and when you come out, but what are you while you’re in the bathroom? European.

You’re American…

You’re American when you go into a bathroom and when you come out, but what are you while you’re in the bathroom? European.
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Why do you… - Dad jokes - Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? Because they're so good at it.

Why do you…

Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? Because they’re so good at it.
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How many apples… - Dad jokes - How many apples grow on a tree? All of them!

How many apples…

How many apples grow on a tree? All of them!
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Two goldfish are… - Dad jokes - Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, “Do you know how to drive this thing?”

Two goldfish are…

Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, “Do you know how to drive this thing?”
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Why do bees… - Dad jokes - Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use a honeycomb.

Why do bees…

Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use a honeycomb.
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The shovel was… - Dad jokes - The shovel was a ground-breaking invention.

The shovel was…

The shovel was a ground-breaking invention.
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I was going… - Dad jokes - I was going to tell a time-traveling joke, but you guys didn’t like it.

I was going…

I was going to tell a time-traveling joke, but you guys didn’t like it.
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This graveyard looks… - Dad jokes - This graveyard looks overcrowded. People must be dying to get in there.

This graveyard looks…

This graveyard looks overcrowded. People must be dying to get in there.
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I used to… - Dad jokes - I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

I used to…

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.
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What kind of… - Dad jokes - What kind of car does a sheep like to drive? A lamborghini.

What kind of…

What kind of car does a sheep like to drive? A lamborghini.
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What do you… - Dad jokes - What do you call a baby monkey? A chimp off the old block.

What do you…

What do you call a baby monkey? A chimp off the old block.
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What do you… - Dad jokes - What do you call a man who can’t stand? Neil.

What do you…

What do you call a man who can’t stand? Neil.
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What’s red… - Dad jokes - What’s red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

What’s red…

What’s red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.
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The wedding was… - Dad jokes - The wedding was so beautiful, even the cake was in tiers.

The wedding was…

The wedding was so beautiful, even the cake was in tiers.
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What do sprinters… - Dad jokes - What do sprinters eat before a race? Nothing—they fast.

What do sprinters…

What do sprinters eat before a race? Nothing—they fast.
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What do you… - Dad jokes - What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho Cheese.

What do you…

What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho Cheese.
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People are usually… - Dad jokes - People are usually shocked that I have a Police record. But I love their greatest hits!

People are usually…

People are usually shocked that I have a Police record. But I love their greatest hits!
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What's black and… - Dad jokes - What's black and white and goes around and around? A penguin in a revolving door.

What’s black and…

What’s black and white and goes around and around? A penguin in a revolving door.
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Dad, can you… - Dad jokes - Dad, can you put the cat out? I didn't know it was on fire.

Dad, can you…

Dad, can you put the cat out? I didn’t know it was on fire.
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What did the… - Dad jokes - What did the caretaker say when they jumped out of the store cupboard? “Supplies!”

What did the…

What did the caretaker say when they jumped out of the store cupboard? “Supplies!”
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What do you… - Dad jokes - What do you call a pudgy psychic? A four-chin teller.

What do you…

What do you call a pudgy psychic? A four-chin teller.
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Do you think… - Dad jokes - Do you think glass coffins will be a success? Remains to be seen.

Do you think…

Do you think glass coffins will be a success? Remains to be seen.
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What did the… - Dad jokes - What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna One, Anna Two!

What did the…

What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna One, Anna Two!
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