Pirate jokes

What’s a pirate’s least favorite veggie? Leeks

What do pirates wear when it gets really cold? Long Johns.

What’s a pirate’s favorite exercise? The plank!

What does the pirate say when his leg gets stuck in the freezer? Shiver me timbers!

Where do pirates keep their valuables? In a jarrrrr

What does a dyslexic pirate say? RRRRRRA!

Why is being a pirate so addictive? Because once you lose your first hand, you get hooked!

What did the ocean say to the pirate? Nothing, it just waved.

How do you save a dying pirate? CPARRRRR

What’s the difference between a pirate and a raspberry farmer? The pirate buries his treasures, but the farmer treasures his berries.

Why are pirates so good at singing? Because they can hit the high C’s!

Why don’t pirates shower before they walk the plank? Because they’ll just wash up on shore later.

How do pirates know that they are pirates? They think, therefore they ARRRR!

What’s a pirate’s favorite kind of food? BARRRR-B-Q!

What type of haircut does a pirate get? A crew cut!

Why did two pirates get into an argument? Because they couldn’t see aye to aye!

What’s a pirates favorite part of a song? The hook!

How much did the pirate pay for his peg and hook? An arm and a leg.

What do you call a stupid pirate? The pillage idiot

What’s a pirates favourite fish dish? Pieces of skate!

What does pirate Santa say? Row row row!

What’s a parrot’s favourite game? Hide and speak!

What’s a pirates favourite type of music? Rum & Bass!

How did the pirate find out he needed glasses? He took an aye exam!

What’s a pirate’s worst enemy? Termites