Scientist jokes
The optimist sees…
The optimist sees the glass half full. The pessimist sees the glass half empty. The chemist sees the glass completely full, half with liquid and half with air.
Why did the…
Why did the bacteria fail the math test? He thought multiplication was the same as division.
What did the…
What did the 30 degree angle say to the 90 degree angle? “You think you’re always right!”
What did the…
What did the scientist say to the chemist whose lab smelled like eggs? Sorry for your sulfering.
There are two…
There are two types of people in the world: Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.
Three statisticians go…
Three statisticians go hunting for deer. They spot one off in the distance. The first one shoots about a meter too high; the second one, about a meter too low; the third one yells, “We got it!”
A molecule tells…
A molecule tells another: “A free-electron once stripped me of an electron after he lepton me. You gotta keep your ion them!”
What did one…
What did one cell tell his sister cell when she stepped on his toe? Ouch! That’s mitosis.