I can’t…

Sausage puns are the wurst!

Why did the red-nosed reindeer help the old lady cross the road? It would have been Rudolph him not to.

Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth. Then it becomes a soap opera.

Patient: “Doctor, I get heartburn every time I eat birthday cake.” Doctor: “Next time, take off the candles.”

What did Blackbeard the pirate say when he turned eighty? "Aye, matey."