What do you…

I have the world’s worst thesaurus. Not only is it terrible, it’s also terrible.

What did the Brittish umpire say to the batter? Europe.

The first time I had sex, I kept the receipt.

Q: How can you tell if a blonde used a computer? A: There's Wite-Out all over the screen.

I got fired from my job at the bank today. An old lady came in and asked me to check...